Songs for the Road: Feeling Center

Last time, I summarized the Doing center in order to arrive at the best choice of road songs for Types 8, 1, and 9. Now I’ll tackle the Feeling Center, which is definitely not my go-to Center of Intelligence. Decades ago, when I was introduced to the MBTI, I tested as an ENTP/J (Extraverted, INtuitive, Thinking, Perceiving/Judging). The alternative to Thinking was Feeling, so no surprise I tested as a Thinking type. But Thinking/Feeling measures the decision-making function, and at the time, I was absolutely confounded that anyone could or would make decisions based on feelings. How was that even possible? (I should add that as a child, I accused my mother of being overly emotional.) After years of attempting to open up to the possibility, I sort of get it now—at least theoretically.

These comments on two aspects of emotional intelligence are excerpted from Daniel Goleman’s book “Emotional Intelligence,” but they come from psychologist Howard Gardner:

Interpersonal intelligence is the ability to understand other people: what motivates them, how they work, how to work cooperatively with them. Intrapersonal intelligence…is a correlative ability, turned inward. It is a capacity to form an accurate, veridical model of oneself and to be able to use that model to operate effectively in life.

The Feeling center—also referred to as the Heart, Emotional, or Relational center—consists of Types 2, 4, and 3. This center is concerned with emotion/feeling, relationship, sexuality, self-gratification, and empathy.

• Type 2s want to be seen by others as necessary and helpful.
• Type 4s want to see themselves as unique or special.
• Type 3s want to be seen as successful both by themselves and by others.

Image

The primary issue for these three types is image (identity without a focal point).

• In order to gain approval and acceptance, Type 2s seek and project an image of helpfulness to others. Concerned with interpersonal intelligence, they tend to be perceived as sociable, cooperative, and friendly.

• In order to feel special, Type 4s seek to develop and maintain an inner image of being different from everyone else. Concerned with intrapersonal intelligence, they often feel estranged or separate from others.

• In order to be—and be seen as—successful, Type 3s seek and project both an outward and an inward image of success. 3s are highly attuned to feedback about how others perceive them (interpersonal intelligence), but they also work at maintaining a consistent internal image of success (intrapersonal intelligence).

Moving Through the World

As with the Doing center types, one type from the Feeling center takes the Aggressive stance (moving against), one type takes the Compliant stance (moving toward or with), and one type takes the Withdrawing stance (moving away). And each stance has a particular relationship with time.

• Type 2s takes the Compliant stance and focus on the present.
• Type 4s takes the Withdrawing stance and focus on the past.
• Type 3s takes the Aggressive stance and focus on the future.

Without knowing anything else about them, we can summarize these three types as follows:

• Type 2s are compliant to their need to be seen as friendly and helpful by others, so they move toward what will help them earn attention and approval. They tend to be concerned with what is right in front of them (subject, as is Type 1 in the Doing center, to what has been called “the tyranny of the immediate moment”). Type 2 is called The Helper, The Giver, The People Pleaser, and The Partner.

•  Type 4s withdraw in order to nurture an internal image of uniqueness, moving away from anything that triggers a sense of something lacking. Like Type 9s, they tend to focus on the past, often feeling victimized by it. Type 4 is called The Individualist, The Tragic Romantic, The Artist, and The Sensitive Person.

•  Type 3s aggressively attempt to maintain both an inner and an outer image of success, moving against anything that prevents them from attaining their goals. Like Type 8s, they tend to hurry through the present and not give much thought to the past. Type 3 is called The Performer, The Succeeder, The Motivator, and the Status Seeker.

Again, while the attributes are accurate for the respective types, these are broad strokes and not intended as more than brief sketches.

The five songs I’ve come up with for each of the Feeling types are:

Type 2

I’ll Take You There  (The Staple Singers)
Bridge Over Troubled Water  (Simon & Garfunkel)
Drive  (The Cars)
Follow Me  (Uncle Kracker)
Spinning My Wheels  (Dada)

Type 4

Running Down a Dream  (Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers)
Magic Carpet Ride  (Steppenwolf)
The Wanderer  (Dion & The Belmonts)
Can’t Find My Way Home  (Blind Faith)
Riders on the Storm  (The Doors)

Type 3

Strut  (Adam Lambert)
I Can Walk On Water  (Basshunter)
I Don’t Take Roads, I Make Them  (Ally Cupcake)
Take the Money and Run  (Steve Miller)
Baby, You Can Drive My Car  (The Beatles)

Please vote for one song for each type by commenting on this post, and if you have suggestions for a song not on this list, please include the title and artist in your comment. After the voting is in for all nine types, I’ll post the list of songs.